Fairysitters

A Fourth Caustrian Tale

 

         Nighttime is when I do most of my work, so I don't like to be bothered. Then, again, the reason I do all my work at night is because I do everyone else's work during the day and prefer to be left alone then, too. Even when I'm physically asleep, I subcon-sciously go to that big old oak desk with the worn top, take all the paperwork for the day and enter it into my memory __s (which take the convenient form of a TI Personal Computer.)

         And I do not like to be disturbed.

         Chris, although maturing at an amazing rate, still isn't old enough to understand that I don't have time to play with her while I'm working.

         She came in yesterday and stood next to me, her little chin resting on the desktop and the tips of her fingers gripping the edge, just watching quietly. I didn't really notice her until she asked, "Ya wanna play jacks?"

         "Hmm?" I asked, looking down at her, slighty startled. "Oh... no, pidg, I'm...I'm kinda busy right now," I said, returning to my daily information sheets. I was still trying to decide whether or not my recent infatuation with the guy in the Scooby Doo outfit from Perry's Pizza Palace should be filed under conscious information or conversational tidbits.

         "Wanna go to the lake?" she ventured again, a bit later.

         "No, really, honey, I'm seriously busy," I returned, deciding the Scooby Doo thing could stay conversational for a day or two and then I'd refile it in conscious info for easy recall. By next week, it'd have to go into the back files, anyway. "Why doncha go create something in your room?"

         "I already did."

         "You did?"

         "I showed it to you ten minutes ago."

         "Oh. Well, why doncha go read something?"

         "I've already read everything in my room."

         "Oh." This was becoming more and more annoying. "Look," I said, my voice expressing my emotions, "I don't care what you do, just do it quietly, okay? I've got a lot to do before morning." I turned back to check out some intake figures and noticed my food level still wasn't too good. Probably'd have to start using my lunch break for its true purpose now. Chris might get a little sick if I got too low.

         "I could help you," she said, reaching up to grab some of my papers.

         "No!" I said snapping out of my reverie just in time to catch yesterday's info sheets. Catch them out of the corner of my eye as they hit the floor, that is.

         "Aww, man, Chris, I've told you before to leave my stuff alone!" I snapped, angrily swinging to the floor to pick up the pounds of paper that I had just finished sorting.

         "I was only trying to help!" she whimpered.

         "You can help leaving me alone!" It occured to me briefly that the two of us sounded like a rerun of some sitcom, but I was too ticked to care.

         She paused for a moment, then said, "I can help you pick it up."

         "No!" I shouted, louder than I'd meant to. "Just go."

         I didn't see her angelic little face form a despondent pout, but I did feel it. She turned at the doorway. I waited for her to explode into a childish fit of rage, but to no avail. "How come you don't love me anymore?" she asked me quietly.

         Ouch.

         I froze and looked at her.

         She gazed back, big blue eyes welling up with tears.

         There's a time and place for kids to learn lessons. This didn't fit into either category.

 

 

         "What we have here is a failure to communicate," said I, as the two of us sat out on the dock of the Lake of Constant Sunset, so named for the fact that I created sunsets everytime we came. Chris sat in the pit my legs made from sitting indian style, her head resting comfortably on my chest. "Now where'd you get the idea I didn't love you?" I prodded gently.

         "You never have time for me anymore, ever since we left school," she replied. "And I don't hardly ever get to give you good dreams anymore, 'cause your always up working in your office or at the center or at the store..."

         "Well, that doesn't mean I don't love you. It just means I've got a lot to do." I said.

         "But I always stop and play with you when I get busy." she answered. "Like, I stop coloring when you say let's go play at the lake."

         "That's not the same thing. See, you're busy playing and I'm busy working."

         "Coloring isn't the same as playing. You can't just scribble all over the place. You gotta concentrate and stay in the lines." I frowned. This was getting me about as far as my inactive Plymouth Champ.

         "Alright, look, kiddo, every night I'll stop and make time to hang out with you, how's that?"

         "Well, what'll I do 'til then?" The theme to Jeopardy began tumbling through my head as I tried to come up with something good. What could I get to keep this kid occupied for at least 23 hours?

         "I'll get back to you on that, alright? Meantime," I said, scooping her up in my arms and tickling her with my face, "we are going to get you set for bed, got it?" She was giggling wildly by this time, so the response was actually better than I'd expected.

         About a half hour later, I was sitting glumly with my head in my hands at my desk. Even when she's not around, I thought, I still get nothing done. I need something fun, like a new game, but versatile so she won't get bored. She's obviously already bored with all the worlds I've created for her and with being babysat by Robin, so this is gonna have to be a new deal everyday. Something she could have all the time and something that would keep her out of trouble. Something small and fairly durable. Something she can talk to instead of annoying me. Something...aww, what's the use!

         I had been coming to this stupid dead end ever since I came up with the bright idea to get her something to do. Real parents either get a good sitter or send the kid to a day care. But how can you send a kid to a day care when she technically doesn't even exist in your own world? And even if she did, would it really be wise to send a future fairy empress to your average day care center? It'd be like sending Tabitha from "Bewitched" to a daycare. Oh, she'd have fun and all, but I doubt little Jimmy's mom wants to find out her darling son has shrunk to a darling 2 inches because the new girl got mad at him.

         Nowhere, nowhere, nowhere, I sighed to myself. I leaned back in my chair and cracked my knuckles in an attempt to stretch out a little. As I looked down at the TI keyboard through the oval my arms made, I frowned in surprise and gently lowered my hands.

         Standing not far from the Function Five key were two fairies, both looking fairly the same. They had the same elvish face and body, but it was like looking at night and day. One looked like the typical fairy with the filmy little dress and almost invisible wings. She stood innocently with her hands behind her back gazing up at me. The other had one jeans, a tight sweater and leg warmers and paid little or no attention to me or anything else but her nails.

         It was unlike me not to say something sarcastic, but I was so taken aback that all I could get out was a simple, "Uh...hi!"

         "Wow! So you're Daina of Threats!" said the innocent looking one. "I've read all about you! You're the one that Lady Robin went to stay with. They said you tortured her and the halfling. Is that true? If it is, please don't do it to us, 'cause I hate to think you called us here just to kill..."

         "Shut up, K'ren," muttered the other one, looking up at me and her partner long enough to get the phrase out.

         "Who are you two and what's this about me calling you?" Then a few key phrases came back to me. Something fun, something she can talk to, something small. Crap, I've done it again, I thought.

         "I'm K'ren and this is my sister, K'rin," said K'ren, curtseying low and elbowing her sister to do the same. "And we came as soon as you called, O Great One. What can we do to help you?"

         "Well, you can start by getting up," I said. "And I'm not Daina of Threats or Great One or any jazz like that. I'm just Daina, plain and simple."

         "Plain and Simple is an odd name," frowned K'ren.

         "Don't be such a drip, K'ren," shot K'rin, clucking her tongue and gasping at her sister in disbelief. "Her name is Daina. Ga-awd!" What a little brat!, I thought. To make her own sister feel like a complete fool in front of someone else...

         "Gee, I'm sorry..." began K'ren softly.

         "Forget it, it's not that big a deal," I replied, throwing K'rin a dirty look. "Hey, as long as you're here, how are you two with children?"

         "I think they're adorable." said K'ren.

         "Kids suck." replied K'rin, not looking up.

         I raised an eyebrow at her. "Well, this isn't exactly a regular kid. This is Christine and she's half human, half fairy. I guess I really just need a good sitter." I said, looking back at K'ren.

         "Oh, let us, please! I promise I'll do everything you ask and I won't let her get into trouble or anything!" she begged, flying up and hovering with her tiny hands clasped together as if she was praying. Her I was beginning to like.

         "Do we have to?" whined K'rin. This one I was ready to put in a Veg-O-Matic just to check all twelve speeds.

         "You, yes," I said, pointing at K'ren. "Her, no way."

         "K'rin, please behave!" said the fairy to her sister. "I can't leave her," she told me confidentially. "We're kind of a team. Really, she's much nicer when you get to know her, I swear. Oh, pleeease let us help, pleeease?"

         I looked from her to K'ren and sighed. It was worth a try. The worst that could happen was Chris would hate them and I'd give 'em the ol' heave-ho. "Well...alright, but we need to talk a few things over." I said, watching K'ren twirl joyfully around the room in mid-air. "Can you guys grow or something so we can talk better? I hate having to talk down to you."

         "Boy, you musta been hanging out with too many bigwigs," said K'rin, shaking her head. "We're just regular fairies, not the incredible snots you're used to." It was as if she was purposely trying to piss me off.

         "Don't worry, I can fix you," said K'ren zooming back over my head. Before I could protest the "fixing me" part, I found myself lying next to the Function Five key staring up at both K'rin and K'ren. "Gee," began K'ren apologetically. "You don't shrink very well, if I may say so."

         "You can say whatever you want, but it's not gonna change the fact that I coulda told you that beforehand. I don't like shrinking, therefore I very rarely take it well." was my sarcastic reply.

         "I can't believe you passed out," said K'rin, disdainfully. I was ready to leap at her, but K'ren held me back and pushed me down. A good move, considering I felt the makings of a major headache coming on.

         "Just stay down for a bit," she said. "When you're feeling a little better and more up to it, I'll change you back." Another good move, considering I didn't feel like doing anymore than she was helping me do, which was lay against the huge key and take five. Then I'd give 'em to K'rin (get it? take five, give five???)

         "Okay," I said, conjuring up an icepack with an unnecessary flourish of my hand and burst of light (even when I feel like crap, I like to show off. A few extra fireworks never hurt anybody). It appeared in my hand and I set it on my head. "You're both hired on probation, meaning you screw up and you can hit the road. Got it?" They both nodded. "Good," I replied, letting my eyelids go halfmast. "I'll tell you what exactly you'll be doing later but, if you can, try teaching the kid some new stuff." I closed my eyes.

         "Like what?" asked K'ren.

         "Healing?" asked K'rin sarcastically.

         "That'd be a start," I agreed, shifting the icebag a little.

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