The
Frustration of Being Good
An
Eighth Caustrian Tale
Part
3
"You want me to what?" Marcus echoed.
"I want you to come hang out with
me for a while," Naomi muttered sourly at him. Then, through clenched
teeth, she added, "Would you please come?"
Marcus looked at her strangely, then
snorted at her in disgust and retorted "No!", as if the answer was a
foregone conclusion. He resumed him crossbow cleaning while Naomi gasped in
exasperation.
"But whyyyyy?" she whined.
"'Cause I hate you!"
"So?"
"So I wouldn't gota hell with you if Priscilla swore she'd be there!" said Marcus, the use of his
love-from-afar's name being enough to convince anyone of his seriousness.
"Mark," Naomi began somberly,
"there are other things in this world more important than women and
love."
"Like?"
"Fun."
"Oh, boy," sighed Marcus,
sensing a blizzard on its way.
"No, I'm serious. Too much of this
courtly love crap can kill you. Take some time off, see the world, spend a
little quality time with your ol' pal."
"How does this help you?"
Marcus asked.
"I-It doesn't..." Naomi
began, but she could see his attention span waning. "Okay, okay, if you go
with me, then I get to go."
"Why?"
"'Cause Dee said," Naomi mumbled.
Marcus looked up with a slow smile.
"Oh, I get it now. I'm supposed to keep an eye on you, aren't I?" he asked,
his voice laden with laughter. Naomi rolled her eyes in response and Marcus
burst into merry guffaws. "You can't even take care of yourself!!!"
he roared. "I have to take care of you!!! Oh, this is rich!!! Oh, this is
beautiful!!!"
"Are you coming or not?" she
snapped.
"Hell, yeah, I'm going!!!" he yelled, wiping tears from his
eyes as he rose. "I'll get my stuff."
"You do that," she said
wryly. Somehow, she thought to
herself, before this is over, I'm gonna
make e-very-body pay for this...
hey, kathy, you there?
daina!
you made it through the week alive, i see.
if i hadn't convinced myself my wallet was
with you, i wouldn't have. you really sent it back in the mail?
yes,
for the millionth time...!
of course you did, i don't know why
i asked.
because
little people are annoying like that.
ha-ha. hey, listen, on another subject
entirely...
finally!
well, whadadya expect, it's my wallet,
babe! listen, now, i need to borrow access to a world from you.
which
one?
seth's. see, uh, naomi is feeling a little
cramped around here, y'know, with her being good and all, so i wanna let her
run around loose for a while.
let
me get this straight. you want me to let naomi run around without restraint in
a realm of mine doing "naomi things" to it?
exactly.
you're
crazy! if she doesn't actually do any damage, she will, at the very
least, annoy the hell out of everyone.
right, but not exactly. see, the reason
i want that realm is because it's full of failsafes. first, she has to bring
marcus with her and he has his own sense of right and wrong that he tends to
inflict on others. second...
she'll have no magic to use, so anything she
does, she'll have to personally answer for.
right. and, third, even if she and he both
get into trouble, eventually, the gods or people of your realm will get pissed
off with her and straighten her out their own way. maybe she might even run
into seth and rahkeei and they'll change her 'tude. either way, she thinks
twice about her actions from then on, learning a much needed lesson about self
restraint. so, whadadya say?
i'm
thinkin', gimme a second. (pause) if she knows where she is in the first place,
then she won't go.
she'll go. i hadn't planned to tell her
where she was headed. she'll know as much as she can see with her own eyes
about this place.
you
really want her to go now, don't you?
i really do, now. i think she'll finally
get the idea that life has repercussions this way.
well,
i don't suppose it could hurt...
really! i mean, it's just naomi we're
talkin' about. naomi with a marcus damper.
that's
true. (*giggle*) how much damage could she possibly do to a realm, anyway?
(*giggle*) yeah, she's got the
effectiveness of a vice president. what're we worried about?
(*major
laughter*) she might shatter windowpanes when she starts whining about having
no magic.
(*major laughter*) then she'll have all the
townspeople die of laughter when she tries to prove how tough she is! (*gasp*)
we're talkin' public enemy #1, here! america's most wanted! guest spots on
geraldo during "lame-ass wanna-be criminal-minded entities" week!
post office mug shot...
rope
it in, dain.
'kay, i'm better now. i'm over it.
(*sigh*) so, can i, or what?
go
for it. but remember...
i know. ultimately, she's my
responsibility.
actually,
i was gonna say that should this backfire, you'll find out whether i really
sent your wallet or not.
say you're joking.
okay...i'm
joking.
no, you're not; you're playing with me and
my mo-neyyyy!
don't
whine in my head, mouse, it grates on my nerves...
(*pout*) you got my mo-ney, man.
maybe.
see ya....!
hey....!